I remember reading a lot of self-help books throughout the years. One of the most common self-help methods is known as affirmations. Affirmations are basically statements that you repeat out loud or in your thoughts on a regular basis. You repeat them to reinforce and bring about certain desires into your life. For example, repeating the phrase, “I am happy”, daily can subconsciously plant the idea in your mind that you are happy.
Supposedly whatever you practice, you become good at it… This makes sense because affirmations are just like that. They are repetitive statements you make, so that you create exactly what it is that you want within yourself. Or at the very least, it will trigger a response from within you to pursue after what it is that you want.
Affirmations are powerful tools that can help one develop a strong, and clear mind. It can also do the opposite. For example, if I say that “I am happy” or “I am successful” all the time, but my reality differs, then I could spiral down the path of depression. The more reality differs from my expectations and desires, the more suffering I can bring up. Continue reading
“Stop wasting time” is one of the most common phrases repeated around me. My mom would tell me to stop wasting time with video games because it is a hobby that doesn’t get you anywhere in life. Nor does it make you any money.
She believed that time is best spent doing something of value. These values can be making a living, or anything productive. I understand her logic, but I don’t understand how does one waste time.
It’s just that in my understanding of time, you cannot waste it. You can’t even control it. Time is always ticking away every second and every moment. It doesn’t matter what you are doing or not doing, time is not in your control. Continue reading
Morality has always been a confusing concept to me. What constitutes good and bad? Who makes the distinction between what is right and wrong or good and bad behavior?
I wrote earlier that we all lived in an inclusive reality, but our views of life are entirely subjective. If our experience of life is generated from within us, then wouldn’t that mean that there is no absolute principle or rule that dictates what is good or bad?
Everybody have their own definition of what is good or bad. Yes, there are external stimuli that can determine your definition of morality. Perhaps you are influenced by your religion, your parents, your surrounding environment, political party, and many other influences. Whatever the case is, how can anyone ever say that an action is good or bad? Good or bad is just your explanation for how the world operates.
Actions, in reality, are not determined by good or bad. If anything, it only operates in the realm of cause and effect. There is a change, or a consequence that follows all activity. Good or bad is not the nature’s doing. It is our doing. It is our karma. Continue reading
It is said that ignorance is bliss. If you don’t know about something, you don’t have to worry about it. This basically means that lack of knowledge can result in happiness. As a young adult, I agreed with the phrase.
Whenever I looked upon children, I was always awed by their innocence. They don’t know about the drama in the world, nor do they care. They simply live in a joyful state. It doesn’t take much for a child to be happy.
To me, I have associated bliss with childhood innocence and ignorance. I know this is true because when I was a child, there were a lot less things that I worried about. I only cared about good grades and video games. Continue reading
Solipsism states that nothing exists in the world, unless it comes from your personal perspective. You are born into a dream-like world where only you truly exist, everyone else is an illusion. Situations and events that occur in your life only happen for your own convenience. In other words, life revolves around you.
I can’t totally agree with the ideas beyond solipsism. This theory seems to stem from egoism. It makes you the sole center of the universe. I find this idea to be a misconception. However, there are partial truths to it.
In our experience of life, we have only seen the entire world from within us. Everything on the outside is interpreted within. In a sense, all our understandings of life come from a bias perspective. There is no such thing as objective view. Continue reading
Being grateful is an amazing state to be in. It is also one of the harder states to be in because we live in a world of consistent consumption and advancement. There is marketing everywhere telling us that we need this or that in order for us to be happy. We must advance in our careers and accumulate more wealth. Everything we do is a means to an end, therefore we cannot and will not be content until our dreams and goals are achieved. Yet the moment we achieved our goals, we create new ones to replace them right away.
I know many people who believed in this. My traditional Asian family and many Asian families (Chinese ones that I know of) are like this. Nothing is more important than money. If you are not spending time making money, you are wasting time. If you don’t make a lot of money, you are useless and worthless. There is a huge emphasis and attention towards the future. We must make sure that our future is bright and having more money is one of the solutions that they found.
At first I didn’t understand why so many traditional Asians are like that. Why do they focus so much on academic success, money, statuses, and other material things? It didn’t make sense to me, but I gradually came to understand their thoughts and actions. They are driven by their conditioned survival instincts. Wealth and prosperity gives them a sense of security. Many of my family members, especially the old ones like my parents, uncles, aunts, and grandparents all grew up poor.
I’ve heard stories from my parents and uncles about their past hardships. My paternal grandparents passed away early, so my dad had to fend for himself. He dropped out of school early and worked to support the family. My Uncle Chan slept in a car and had to split a burger with his wife when he first came to America. Continue reading
We live in an information age. So much knowledge is accessible right under our finger tips. We can search online for countless information on topics that are just as endless. It is a marvel sight to behold. I cannot stress enough how seemingly unlimited amount of resources are out there for free.
Just within the internet we have: websites dedicated to online courses and educational videos; forums for countless discussions; free e-books; and competitions. With so many opportunities for learning and growth, there is practically nothing that a person can’t learn.
I don’t know if you understand the magnitude of what I’m saying, but it is simply AMAZING.
Want to learn the technical skills that plumbers, electricians, and carpenters know? You can do that.
Want to learn a different language, perhaps even a computer programming language? You can do that.
Want to learn how to travel around the world on a tight budget, or learn how to be a digital nomad? You can do that.
Want to become an entrepreneur by creating your own company, hiring freelancers, or learning how to sell your own products? You can do that.
Any questions you can come up with, there is a very high possibility that someone out there already has the answer.
All that is required of you is to ask the right questions. Ask the questions, search them up, and learn. That is how the journey of a lifelong learner begins. Continue reading
My first encounter with death was when I was 5 years old. My maternal great grandma died during that time. I remembered very vague details from her funeral. But the only thing I remembered clearly was her inanimate body positioned upright on a chair. The funeral director had combed her hair and dressed her up in a traditional Chinese qipao. She sat there motionlessly, but her lifeless eyes stared forward.
Before her, many of my relatives stood shoulders to shoulders around her. My maternal grandma was on her knees wailing and crying out loudly. My grandpa was standing there stoic in his outward appearance, but suffering on the inside. My aunts, uncles, and parents all had their own fair share of misery, emotional outbreak, and silence. I stood there behind them, but I didn’t share in their emotion of misery and loss. I was too young to understand that, but I did feel something that day. I felt fear. Continue reading
“You guys know what an epiphany is right?” Mrs. Robinson, my 11th grade English teacher spoke out to the rest of the class. “It’s an experience of sudden realization when you gain a new and deeper perspective on a situation. Have any of you experienced this before?”
I slowly raised my head from my daydreaming posture, where I fixed my eyes blankly on my rectangular desk. My eyes were wide open.
“What did she just say?” I paused, trying to take in the message behind her words. I tilted my head to stare straight at my English teacher with anticipation.
“There is a name for such an experience???” I thought while waiting patiently for her to speak again.
Mrs. Robinson eyed the classroom looking for a reply to her question before continuing her story. Her head gently rotated around her neck as she made a swift, circular motion to stare at all her students.
“When I was young, I never really understood why my family members are so loud. It bothered me. Each time when they had a conversation, they would raise their volume for no reason. I couldn’t understand why they always interrupt each other by raising their voice, but one day I had an epiphany.” She paused to gather her deep thoughts.
“I realized that was how my family members communicate with others. They spoke loudly because they just wanted to be heard. They interrupt others because they don’t have the capacity to hear what others have to say. They are concerned about their own problems, and they all want to express them. So when they speak, they hope that their voices could be heard, but no one was willing to listen. Everyone wanted to be understood, but no one was reaching out to understand others. I…” Mrs. Robinson breathed deeply and exhaled. “I was no longer bothered by their loud voices anymore…” Continue reading
The hour hand stuck 9 PM on the old wooden clock hanging above the entrance door to my parent’s Chinese restaurant. As if driven by instinct, one by one everyone stopped whatever they were doing. The waiters and my parents sprinted into the kitchen. Within a minute or two, groups of them came pouring out the large kitchen door holding metal insert pans filled with traditional Chinese food. The day was almost over and it was time for dinner.
Dinner at the restaurant felt like a tradition; we always ate at the same time. But that day was different. Why? Because it was the day I asked my parents for the meaning of life. As a 14 year old kid going through puberty, I was in a phase when I was questioning my existence. For days, weeks, and perhaps months I had been pondering about the meaning of life. I wanted to know the reason for my being, the absolute purpose for why I exist. Continue reading